I began my college experience in the fall of 1983. I had made it into James Madison University (JMU) by the skin of my teeth and now I was going to pursue my dream of becoming a band director.
Leaving home
Many kids have parents who send them off to camp for a week in the summer. Some will go away to a relative’s house or friend’s house and spend a few nights. I didn’t do that. Our church took us on a youth retreat for a weekend when I was in junior high and it was a disaster for me. More about that some other time.
I was not used to being away from home and JMU was 6 hours away! So, I cried like a baby when Mom and Dad dropped me off. I can still see them walking down that sidewalk. To be clear, I didn’t cry where everyone could see, I did that in my room.
No car, no friends, no family and Mom and Dad said they’d be back to get me for Thanksgiving break.
Marching band
Marching band to the rescue! JMU had/has a one week band camp before classes start. This gave me the opportunity to spend time with like minded people and it really helped me make quick connections. Especially since the JMU band was/is VERY social.
Every night was a party. If you didn’t go to the social events in the evening you were considered a bit odd. And, by that definition, I was more than a bit odd. But, maybe I could change? No one knew me here. Maybe I could reinvent myself and become the social and popular kid!
I determined that I would go to social events. If it was a dance, I would ask girls to dance. I’d drink beer and, “fit in”.
Beer?
I immediately knew I wasn’t a beer drinker. The taste was and is repulsive me. How do people drink this stuff? I surmised that the idea was to drink this bitter concoction as quickly as possible in order to get drunk. Then you wouldn’t notice the foul flavor.
I knew people who said they drank beer because they liked it, but to this day I can’t understand. It seems like spraying Lysol in my mouth would taste better. But, to each his own.
For me, beer was checked off my list.
Dancing?
How about dancing? My parents loved to dance. They took me with them a few times and I watched them moving around on the dance floor. It looked like fun.
So, I went to dances and I loved it… at first. I asked young ladies that I didn’t know to dance! And they said, Yes!! I could get used to this.
But, a few weeks into the semester I went to a dance in the basement of a dorm and asked a beautiful young lady to dance. She said yes and the song immediately switched to something slow. I thought she’d decline to slow dance with me, a complete stranger.
I was wrong. She pulled up on me tightly. My Mom never held me this tight. Did I like it? Yes! I thought that she had some immediate attraction to me. But, when the song ended, she pulled away. We spoke for a few minutes and then went our separate ways.
I walked through the door, went up the steps and walked out of the dorm. My mind was racing. What kind of craziness is this? Drinking till we’re drunk and dancing like we’re honeymooners. This is nuts!
And, that was the last dance that I attended at JMU.
Regrets?
Looking back at my first weeks at college, I realize how blessed I was. The JMU band had allowed me to begin friendships with some quality guys. These friends were vital to my college experience and I still value their friendship.
I’m also thankful that I didn’t enjoy drinking. I can’t imagine the trouble I was spared just simply because I didn’t like the taste of beer. And dancing? Again, I am grateful that there was something in me that found these dances to be a bad idea.
How much trouble could I get into when I’m 6 hours away from home and getting drunk at a party? No one around knew me. Mom and Dad would never know what happened. Add the temptation of a young lady pressing herself against me on the dance floor.
Thank you, God for steering me clear of this kind of trouble!